Back in June 2017 I made a last minute decision to escape to the white isle for a month. My little one was in nursery, but an apartment become available in St Eulalia and I just booked it without too much thought. I had dreamt of travelling with Flo a lot more in her younger years but circumstances did not make it possible. It was similar to a volcano exploding and the need for Vitamin Sea!! The plan was to play in the day and sit on the beautiful balcony in the evening to write (wine and candlelight style) BUT my toddler had other ideas – She fully embraced the party island and was up most evenings in the very child friendly bars/restaurants. I loved the freedom to parent with less restriction. Spanish children sleep in the afternoon so they have energy to be up with parents in the evening. I also made use of the afternoon siestas with her!! The playgrounds are open until very late in the evening and I loved hearing children playing in the cooler evening hours, rather than night isolation as I call it.
I have some lovely friends in Ibiza who filled me on the latest events and parties, I was so happy Flo could tag along and be my party buddy. I loved seeing the delight in her eyes witnessing the experiential side of Ibiza.. Las Dalias is perfect for kids with a fun packed kids area and music/drinks/entertainment the adults can enjoy alongside. The hippy market is full of wondrous beings adorned with elaborate outfits and artists painting huge canvases. This may sound strange but I enjoy Flo being with me rather than worrying about if she is happy with random baby-sitters at home. She really is such fun and a bit of a party animal.
Our trip was full of syncronoicity and serendipity, one day similtaneously flowed to the next and we met some amazing people who were so kind and friendly. Flo joined a farm school for a week which looking back was a little too full on for her. (She goes 100 miles an hour and doesn’t have a good off switch) But this gave me some time to write as it wasn’t happening in the evening and of course talk to more locals..I do love to talk.
I was so happy to hear of another conscious mum living on the Island, who was running her first ever positive parent day trip. Excited to meet like minded island mums and a day of learning whilst hiking the most breathtaking views in Ibiza, it was a day I couldn’t miss out on.
I do have a fairly fixed negative default and I have always worried how this may impact my little one. I’m over aware of language used when speaking with her and I’m keen to understand the growth mindset. I already hear her saying she can’t do things or she is not very good. (She isn’t even at school yet so there must be a built in wire here)
I loved the walking party of Jade’s structure, being in nature is super healing and refreshing, learning in the outdoors also keeps you interested and engaged (classrooms kinda suck). The ultimate treat when we reached the bottom of the hike was a delicious lunch and a dip in the sea. Jade is passionate about positive parenting and it was so interesting to hear her first hand experiences. We all wish we could handle situations with more love, patience and positivity and Jade certainly gave us some tools to improve interactions. The growth mindset was the most valued part – We are so used to striving for excellence and beating ourselves up for failure. To instil effort, growth and determination into their little brains, praising them without saying well done and thats amazing all the time! We talked about the need for failure and how to celebrate mistakes..rather than fear them.
I had a super tired toddler whilst away, all the late nights and sunny fun packed days meant just a few meltdowns.. I was very tired myself and managing the challenging behaviour was tough. BUT having tools, phrases and relaxation methods all aid a better parent/child relationship. I still have so far to go and note failings along the way but everyday I learn something new and perspective shifts with every challenge. When you have a strong willed child is can be so hard to adapt practises and change pathways, but being aware is a good first start.
Follow Jade to hear more about upcoming hikes and courses at www.apositiveparent.net
PS. I think I would parent a lot more positively if I lived in Ibiza….!! Lets plan some retreats there for now xx